Friday, November 17, 2006

Car Accident (Y1/M7/D17)

I had a car accident. I know you are dying for all the details and here they are:

I was the first car in the northbound left turn lane (Car #1). There was a car in the southbound left turn lane (Car #2). Another car was heading southbound in the thru lane (Car #3).

Car #3 decides that he doesn't really want to go thru, he wants to go left, so he gets in the southbound left turn lane behind Car #2. (Seriously, if you are going to read this whole thing, you should probably use your coffee cup for Car 1, your mouse for Car 2, and your stapler for Car 3 in the desktop re-enactment. Spoiler: Bad things happen to Car 3). Anyhoodle...

I proceed to turn left because it's all clear. Just then, Car 3 decides he wants to go thru after all. So he looks in his rear view mirror, sees some southbound traffic, and decides to dart out in front of the southbound thru traffic and into the intersection. Which is exactly where my car was at the time. Of course, because he was looking in the rear view mirror, he saw my GIGANTIC EFFING SUV way too late and crashed into my rear passenger door.

His car was pretty much totalled and his airbags went off and everything. My rear passenger door needs to be replaced but I hardly felt the impact. This is where it gets good.

Car #4 was directly behind me in the northbound left turn lane just prior to the accident. For whatever reason, the woman driving Car #4 hates the very oxygen I breathe. I have no idea why. But anyway, she pulls over, she points a finger at me and screams (screams!) "It's all your fault I saw everything!"

I say to her: "How could you have seen if the intersection was clear when you were directly behind me?"

"I saw everything and so did the other two people in my car!"

To which I respond: "Did you see him [points at offending driver] pull into the left turn lane then drive over the solid white line and dash into the intersection?"

She (still screaming): "That doesn't matter! You were turning left and the left-turn person is ALWAYS wrong! I used to work for an attorney!"

I refrain from telling her that I am, in fact, an attorney myself because I divine that this will make her hate me even more deeply. Instead, I say: "It's up to the insurance companies."

Then she gets her card and gives it to the offending driver (who is fumbling around so much that I start to suspect he has no insurance) and refuses to give me her contact information BECAUSE I AM AT FAULT AND SHE KNOWS IT!

Turns out he didn't have insurance ... BUT it wasn't his car and the car owner had insurance. Whew.

But you know what the real problem here is? He is going to lie. He is going to say he was just driving along minding his own business and I lurched out in front of him. And the witness obviously pull her bizarro Jerry-Springer routine: "THAT WOMAN IS AT FAULT! I SAW EVERYTHING!" My only hope is that Crazy Screamer Lady will recall that she and I discussed the fact that he pulled in and out of the left turn lane.

Tune in next time for pictures of El Sid frolicking at the beach.

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